Marriage Humo

Marriage Humor （婚姻幽默）

Wife: 'What are you doing?'
妻：你在作什麼啊？
Husband : Nothing.
夫：沒作什麼。
Wife : 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'
妻：沒作什麼？你看著我們的結婚證書，足足有一小時了。
Husband : 'I was looking for the ex pi ry date.'
夫：我在尋找它的有效日期是到什麼時候。
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Wife : 'Do you want dinner?'
妻： 要吃晚餐嗎？
Husband : 'Sure! What are my choices?'
夫： 當然！我可以選擇嗎？
Wife : 'Yes or no.'
妻：要或不要。
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Wife: 'You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?'
妻：為什麼你經常把我的照片放在你皮夾裡？
Hubby: 'When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your pi cture and the problem disappears.'
夫：當問題發生時，不管有多困難，我看著妳照片就迎刃而解了。
Wife: 'You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you!'
妻：你看我對你有多麼驚人的影響力啊！
Hubby: 'Yes! I see your pi cture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?'
夫：是啊！望著妳的照片我問自己，還有什麼困難比這個來得大呢？
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Stress Reliever Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.'
女孩：婚後我要分擔你所有的煩惱、困擾，以減輕你的負擔。
Boy: 'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.'
男孩：親愛的，妳真體貼，但我並沒有任何煩惱或困擾。
Girl: 'Well that's because we aren't married yet.'
女孩：哦？那是因為我們還沒結婚的緣故。
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Son: ' Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.'
子：今早我和爹地一起搭車，他要我讓座給一位女士。
Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.'
母：嗯，你這麼做是對的。
Son: 'But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap.'
子：但是，媽，我當時是坐在爹地的腿上呢。
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A newly married man asked his wife, 'Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?'
一位新婚的先生問他太太：如果我父親沒留下巨額財產給我，你會嫁給我嗎？
'Honey,' the woman replied sweetly, 'I'd have married you, N O MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!'
女人溫柔的答道：親愛的，不管是誰留下財產給你，我都會嫁給你的。
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Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever .
女孩對著男友說：吻我一下，我就永遠屬於你了。
The guy replies: 'Thanks for the early warning.'
男孩回道：謝謝您提早警告我。
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A wife asked her husband: 'What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?'
妻問夫：你最喜歡我哪一點？我美麗的臉龐，還是我性感的軀體？
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: 'I like your sense of humor.'
他把她從頭到腳瀏覽了一遍，回道：我喜歡你的幽默感。

FW: [Seletarians] Indian goes to a grocery store

An Indian goes to Australia and goes to Woolworths (A grocery store in Australia). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of cat food and goes to check out.

The Manager gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy cannot have a cat and will probably feed cat food to his kids. He asks the Indian to show him his cat before he could let him have cat food. The Indian goes home and returns with a cat and gets to buy the cat food.

Next week the Indian finds dog food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of dog food and goes to check out.

The Manager again gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy has a cat but he cannot have a dog and he will probably feed dog-food to his kids. He asks the Indian to bring and show him the dog before he can let him have dog food.

The Sardar goes home and returns with a dog. He gets to buy the dog food.

Next week the Indian comes to Woolworths with a bag. He asks the manager to put his hand in the bag.

The Manager puts his hand in the bag, feels some thing slimy and immediately takes it out. He shouts at the Indian, What the F*** is this? Is this shit you Idiot?

The Indian calmly replies, “Yes, and I want to buy toilet paper.”？

FW: What a great way to explain socialism.

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before but had once failed an entire class.



That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.



The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism. All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade so no one would fail and no one would receive an A. The Class agreed!



After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B.



The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy.



As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.



The second test average was a D! No one was happy.



When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.



The scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.



All failed, to their great surprise, and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward and shares it with those not earning it, no one will try or want to succeed.



It just doesn't get any simpler than this.

FW: Why America is in crisis

An Israeli doctor,a German doctor, A Russian doctor and An American doctor from Texas happened to have a lunch together.

The Israeli doctor says 'Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in six weeks.'

The German doctor says 'That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in four weeks.

A Russian doctor says 'In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in two weeks.'

The American Texas doctor, not to be outdone, says 'You guys are way behind, we recently took a man with no brains out of Texas, put him in The White House for eight years, and now half the country is looking for work.

FW:Malaysia: Where will we be in 2020......?

Malaysia: Where will we be in 2020......?
Please read this email as it is very well-written and easy-to-understand....
especially the last few paragraphs, which makes a lot of sense .

Where is our direction for our next generation..?

For those who started work around 1973, a 1.3 Litre Japaness car was RM7,000.
Today the equivalent is.... let's say RM60,000.......8.5 times

In 1973 a double storey house was about RM45,000..or less.
Today it is about RM300,000............6.6 times

In 1973 an Engineer's pay was RM1,000 .
Today it is about RM2, 000+/-............2 times....

From 1973 to 2008........35 years......what is the Trend?
Bearish !!!!

In a stock market when the trend is bearish, what do we do? ..Exit !!!
When a country's trend is bearish what do we do?

This Bearish trend is more difficult to turn around as compared to the stock market.

I have used these 3 items : House, Car & Salary as a measurement of the country's performance for the past 35 years....
Foreigners also ask about these 3 items to gauge our standard of living.

There is a book I saw in MPH bookshop entitled : “ Malaysia : The Failed Nation”.
Some of you may be interested to read it. I agreed with the writer.....

This morning I was having coffee at McDonald (now the coffee..100 % Arabica beans..is quite good@ RM 2.90....free refill !!
I asked how much per hour is their pay?
RM3.00 x 8 hours = RM24 per day x 25 days = RM600 per month

My daughter works part-time during her University days..she worked at Gloria Jeans Coffee.... the pay?
Australian $14.00 @ 3.15 = RM44 per hour x 8 = RM352 per day x 25 days = RM8,800 ...13.3 times more !!!!!
......Price of houses in Perth is about the same in KL .

Price of cars are about 23% cheaper in Perth .

I think more and more people are becoming aware of this Bearish trend.

Developed country by 2020...means High income country!!

Let's look at some as of year 2005 (Financial Times)
USA GNP per capita US$35, 400
UK GNP per capita US$25,510
Australia GNP per capita US$19 ,530
Singapore GNP per capita US$20,690

These are developed countries by income measurement....
Malaysia 's GNP per capita US$3,540

Year 2020..developed country?
Really...a sad story. Worrying Trends, isn't it??

Ringgit sliding further and further under BN.

Recently, I interviewed some fresh graduates applying for jobs with my engineering company.
I accepted two applicants on a starting salary of RM1,600. It struck me as odd that 15 years
ago, I myself started work as a fresh graduate engineer for the same pay.

Indeed, if you compare the salaries of graduates now and 15 or even 20 years ago, you'll find
little difference but that their purchasing power is vastly different. It's the same story when you
compare salaries of shop assistants, office staff, factory workers and others.

To compound the effect of inflation, the ringgit has depreciated greatly against all major currencies.
The real income of most Malaysians has moved backwards.

This is why many Malaysians suffer under the petrol hike. The root of the problem is that our real
incomes have shrunk in the face of inflation and depreciated currency.. Malaysians have not been
spoiled by subsidy but are unable to move out of the time lock of stagnated and depreciated incomes.

If you compare the per capita incomes of Singapore , Hong Kong , Taiwan and South Korea , they are
a few multiples of ours although at independence all these countries were the on the same economic
level as Malaysia .

What has gone wrong? We were the rising star of East Asia , a country rich in natural resources with
the most promising potential.

The reason is massive corruption, plundering of resources, wastage of funds for huge non-economic
projects, anti-public interest deals with politically-linked companies and passing-of-the-buck to the
man in the street..

Four decades of NEP where education, economic and employment policies are defined by race ensured
that meritocracy took a back seat.

Our university standard has declined and the today best and brightest of our youths emigrate to escape
the racial inequility only to contribute to the economies of foreign lands.

The reputation of our judiciary which was held in high esteem worldwide has sunk so low that foreign
investors now insist on arbitration in Singapore in case of any dispute.

We also have a slew of oppressive laws such as the ISA, OSA, Uuca and PPPA which stifle free speech
and are designed to keep the ruling parties in power.

We have become less attractive to foreign investors and now lag behind our neighbours in Asean for foreign
direct investment. Even some corporations who have established themselves here are moving out.

All the economic and social malaise cannot help but affect the value of our currency. The strength of a
country's currency is after all, a reflection of its fundamentals.

Furthermore, Bank Negara has a policy of weak ringgit to help exporters, never mind the burden on the
common folk. The government is pro-corporation, not pro-rakyat.

While the poor and middle-class are squeezed, an elite group gets breathtakingly rich. We have the
distinction of having the worse income disparity in Asean. A re-distribution of wealth is under way from the
poor and middle-class to a select group of politically-connected elite.

The end result of this re-distribution will be a small group of super-rich while the majority are pushed into
poverty and the middle-class shrinks. This is what happens when the rich gets richer and the poor get poorer.

There is much that is wrong with Malaysia . The responsibility for pulling the country backwards can be laid
squarely at the door of the ruling regime. It is BN's mis-governance, racial politics and culture of patronage
which has seen the country regress economically and socially.

We seem to be sliding down a slippery slope, further down with each passing year of BN's rule. Another five
years of BN rule and we'll be at Indonesia 's standard under Suharto. Another 10 years and we'll be touching
the African standard. What a way to greet 2020!!!!

Is there any hope for Malaysia ?

Faced with the reality that BN will never change, many Malaysians desperate for change turn their lonely
eyes to Anwar Ibrahim.

Pakatan Raykat has promised to treat all races fairly, to plug wastage, fight corruption, reform the judiciary
and make Malaysia more competitive.

But some have questioned whether we can trust Anwar and his loose coalition of disparate parties..

The question is not whether we can trust Anwar and Pakatan Rakyat but whether we can afford not to.

Can we afford another ten years of BN's misrule?

Fw: WHAT CAUSES ARTHRITIS!?

Another good one.

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway next to a priest.

The man's tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and

a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He

opened his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked, "Say Father,

what causes arthritis?"

The priest replies, "My Son, it's caused by loose living, being with

cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man,

sleeping around with prostitutes and lack of a bath."

The drunk muttered in response, "Well, I'll be damned, " Then returned to

his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and

apologized. "I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long

have you had arthritis?"

Fw:6pm至6am是女生權益（重要咨詢）

Subject: 6pm至6am是女生權益（重要咨詢）
Women's Rights 6 pm to 6 am (important for your knowledge)

Dear all,
Please read and share with your loved one ....

IMPORTANT
Women's Rights 6 p.m. to 6 a.m.
I was talking with a lawyer friend of mine.
We were discussing the law and women's rights.

She told me about this incident
- a young girl was raped by a man posing as a plain clothes officer;
he asked her to come to the police station when she and her male
friend didn't have a driver's license to show. He sent the boy off to
get his license and asked the girl to accompany him to the police
station.

Took her instead to an isolated area where the horrendous crime was committed.

In fact, the law clearly states that between 6 pm and 6 am , a woman
has the right to REFUSE to go to the Police Station, even if an arrest
warrant has been issued against her...

It is a procedural issue that a woman can be arrested between 6 pm and
6 am , ONLY if she is arrested by a woman officer and taken to an ALL
WOMEN police station.
And if she is arrested by a male officer, it has to be proven that a
woman officer was on duty at the time of arrest.

It is good for us to know our rights. To what extent it comes of use
remains to be seen in any situation. But as they say, knowledge is
power. Just thought I'd share this with you. I did not know this and
am sure lot of us will not know this- please be informed..... And pass
on this info to whom all you know.......


各位女士們注意：

傍晚6pm至早上6am是女生權益（重要咨詢）

曾經與一位律師朋友聊天得知，我們正談論法律和女士的權益問題...

律師朋友告訴我一個案：
一個年輕的少女被身穿便服的男警察強奸了。當時，少女和男友拿不出駕駛執照，這警察要求少女跟她回警察局，要其男友回家去拿駛照 。
途中就載少女到一処偏僻地方，強奸了她。

律師朋友清楚說到：其實女士們在傍晚6pm-6am是有權利拒絕任何（男）警察的要求，自己單獨跟隨一或一群（男）警察囘返警局。即使有通緝令，也可以暫時拒絕。
除非，當時是被女警逮捕，而且警察局裏的警察人員都是《女警》在當值。又或者，被男警逮捕時有女警在場。否則一概可拒絕。

這法律知識對我們很有幫助，以防備下囘有類似事情發生在我們身上、家人朋友身上。
因爲很多人對《法律》和《警方程序》的無知，而不幸受害真的很多。

說真的，對此我之前真的不知道，相信也有很多人不知道。。

FW:ACancer Killer in the Kitchen - Ginger

ACancer Killer in the Kitchen - Ginger
The powerful healing effects of ginger have been well
documented. It's a proven remedy for upset stomach. Reams of
studies show that it inhibits inflammation. And there is
substantial evidence that it fights cancer too.

For instance, a recent Universityof Michiganstudy showed that
when ginger was added to ovarian cancer cells in the
laboratory, it caused the cancer cells to self-destruct (a
process known as "apoptosis"). In a separate study at the
Universityof Minnesota, researchers injected colon cancer
cells into mice that were bred to have no immune system.

Half of these mice were routinely fed gingerol, the main
active
component in ginger. The researchers found that the mice that
were fed gingerol lived longer, their tumors were smaller,
and the cancer did not spread as widely as in the control
group.

With all these health benefits, you should be using ginger as
often as you can. The best way I've found to get a healthy
serving of ginger is to juice it. (The brand of juicer I use
is an Omega.) Two or three days a week, I juice an apple or
two, some carrots, spinach, broccoli, cabbage, and a big
piece of ginger root.


The ginger gives the drink a great flavor and a powerful
anti-cancer kick.
I highly recommend that you try it.


<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>


Healing and cleansing with barley

High in fibre, barley is also a kidney cleanser. Better yet,
regular intake of it helps prevent heart disease. BARLEY
water was always a regular drink when we were still living
at home. Whenever we had to go for a medical exam that
included a urine test, my mum would make us drink barley
water a day before it to make sure we got a positive result!

My mother was a wise woman. I later found out from an
Australian naturopath that barley is known to be a kidney
cleanser, and she happily downed glasses of it at a meal we
had in a coffee-shop here.

Barley is good for your intestinal health too. Try to eat the
barley grains you find in your drink or sweet broth with fu
chook (beancurd skin) and ginkgo nuts.

It's high in fibre which feeds the friendly bacteria in the
colon and helps speed up the transit of fecal matter in it.
In this way it helps prevent haemorrhoids and colon cancer.

The propionic acid and beta glucan from barley's insoluble
fibre also help lower cholesterol and prevent the formation
of gallstones.

Eating barley regularly is a preventive step against heart
disease as, besides the fibre content, it is also high in
niacin, a B vitamin good for lowering cholesterol.

Diabetics should eat more barley as the fibre will prevent
blood sugar levels from rising too high. It also provides
relief from constipation or diarrhoea for those suffering
from Irritable Bowel Syndrome.

Barley is rich in selenium which prevents cancer and relieves
symptoms of asthma and arthritis. It is a good source of
manganese, copper and phosphorous.

Malt sugar comes from sprouted barley which, when fermented,
is an ingredient in beer and other alcoholic beverages.

Barley, whose Latin name is " hordeum vulgare" , has been
cultivated for more than 10,000 years.
Since ancient times, barley has been used for healing
purposes and has been known to the Chinese, Egyptians, Greeks
and Romans. Athletes in Greeceand Romein those days were
known to eat barley bread to give them strength.

Besides the usual things we do with barley, I enjoy having it
in a western soup. The larger pearl barley is used and I love
the sticky bite of it.
Here's a recipe for barley soup:

Barley soup with roasted garlic

1 cup pearl barley
5 cloves whole garlic, roasted
2 litres chicken stock, steeped from 1 chicken breast
simmered in three litres water
2 tbsps vegetable oil
2 large onions, diced
2 carrots, diced
2 stalks celery, diced
150g turkey ham, cut up
1 tsp ground white pepper
1 tsps sea salt or to taste
1 tbsp chopped parsley

Method
1. Wash barley and soak it in a bowl of water for three
hours. Drain.

2. Heat oil in pan and fry onions. Add carrots and celery,
then the barley and fry for three minutes.

3. Add chicken stock, pepper and roasted garlic and simmer
over low heat for at least an hour, or until barley is soft.

4. Add salt to taste and serve the soup garnished with
chopped parsley

Fwd: 故事很簡單，卻很重要。

小孩吵架,最應該要教育的幾乎都是大人….


「小外甥在學校闖禍了！」接到爸爸的電話。

「什麼事啊？！」我問。

「聽說把小朋友打到流鼻血啦！」

爸爸有些緊張，他要我立即前往學校了解情況並處理。

我一直很疼小外甥，他個性很憨厚，為何會出手打人呢？我實在搞不懂！

於是立即放下手邊工作，逕往學校去……

進導師辦公室時，映入眼簾的是：我的大姊一直彎腰卑恭的向對方家長道歉…但是對方
家長似乎完全不領情，脾氣火得像什麼似的…對方家長還一直說要找警察來，一定要把
小外甥關起來…！！！

看看站在一旁的小外甥，他的臉色鐵青，一肚子火氣，我知道他從小的脾氣就是拗，但
是從來不和人惡搞的！

他今天動手打人，我相信一定有他的原因…

我一進去導師室，什麼話都懶得說，直接抱起了小外甥，說：『不要怕！舅舅來了！你
什麼話都可以說！』

這時小外甥終於忍不住哭了起來…

『打人就不對了！說什麼說！還有臉哭？！』對方家長劈頭就這樣堵我！

我火氣也來了，決定嚇對方一下，開口就操台語開罵：『幹！你是三小！沒看見恁倍在
教厝裡的小孩講實話喔？！』

『你不滿的話，去傳人過來！』

『恁倍最看不起不懂事理就說：打人就不對ㄟ人！』

對方先是愣住了！頓時聲音變得一片寧靜…

（看來，社會上多數還真的欺負善良的人…！）

打破沉寂，直接問老師發生事情的原委！

沒想到老師也說不出所以然（這時候我的火氣真的來了），於是我讓小外甥告訴大家為
何他要打人！

同時我要求被打的小朋友一起站在老師面前，要他們當面對質！

『美術課，我在做我的勞作啊！』
『他很沒禮貌，過來借我的東西都不說一下！』
『但是我不想要借他啊！』
『他每次向人家借東西都不還，也不會珍惜…！』
『今天他拿了我的萬能糊就跑！我就衝過去要拿回來！』
『但是他都不還我，我也搶不回來！』
『他突然把我的萬能糊往窗外丟，別的同學幫我撿起來！』
『他還用很難聽的話一直罵我…』
『我叫他不要再亂罵，他就對我比中指，還向我吐口水…』指著自己的鞋子。
『所以我生氣就一拳打過去…』
『他…流鼻血了…』
小外甥低著頭，很後悔的表情。
…………………
……………………………
……………………………………………
當小外甥敘述過程的同時，我一直盯著這個小朋友和家長，並不斷確認對方的反應，其
實我完全相信小外甥不會亂說…

我回頭問挨打的小朋友：『 那時候 老師呢？！』

「上廁所…」他小聲的說。

『他講的有沒有不對的呢…？！』我接著問。

「我有跟他借啊！」他反駁。

『借個萬能糊也沒什麼啊…！』對方家長從旁幫腔。

『但是他有答應要借你嗎？！』我不讓他閃躲，他回答不上來…。

『小氣！借我們不就好了嗎…？！』對方家長這時理直氣壯的說。
我狠狠的瞪了對方家長一眼，這下真的是秀才遇到兵了…

知道不來些突然的手腕可能沒完沒了，立即轉頭告訴老師：「既然家長這麼喜歡請警察
來，還是請你撥電話請東門派出所的員警先生來一趟好了！」這句話一出來，全部的人
都愣住了！（包括對方家長）

接著我緩緩的說：『今天我們的小孩的確打人，犯了錯，實在傷害了同學！』

『我們願意就法律層面完全負責，包括醫療賠償！』

『但沒經過別人的同意，私下拿就是偷，公開強取就是搶！』

『畢竟起因是對方強奪我們的物品，我們絕對不會放過！』

『搶奪他人財物屬於公訴罪，屬於非告訴乃論，一經提告就無法撤銷！』

『未來提告的話，那個部分請他們自己負責！我就此先聲明！』

知道自己語氣說得很緩，但是絕對有很強的殺傷力！

老師當然不願意打這通電話，立即出來緩頰…

但是我態度非常堅持，我說：『既然你們讓我出來處理，對方家長也只認為是我們家的
小孩很小氣，似乎所有的錯都是我們造成的！我們何必再多有爭執呢？！』
『讓這件事直接交給司法公正單位處理，對大家不是另一種學習嗎？！』

頓時對方家長突然像洩了氣的皮球，不能再多說什麼…！

趁著氣勢正強，我直接補了一句：『還是不要麻煩警察先生來這兒好了，我們一起前往
警察局，好嗎？！』

我直接走向對方家長面前，正式的邀約…


半餉，對方家長看著我說：『有這麼嚴重嗎？！』

情勢演變讓我覺得對我方有利，但必須忍著些，我皺著眉頭說：『我不知道！』

『因為是你們的態度讓我覺得很嚴重啊！！！』

『要找警察來，是你們先提出來的！』

『一定要關我們家的小孩，也是你們堅持的！』

『換作是你，不嚴重嗎…？！』

『只是我覺得來龍去脈既然我們都清楚了，我也認為必須採取行動啊！』

『我不袒護自己的小孩，他有錯，就該承擔受罰！』

『但起因是你們的小孩搶奪，我也必須讓我的小孩知道我行事公正！』

『是非對錯我們何必再浪費彼此的時間，私下在這兒討論個沒完沒了呢？！』

『讓法官和執法單位來教育我們的小孩，難道不好嗎？！』

…………………空氣又凝結了起來…………

對方的媽媽突然問我：『你要告我們什麼？』

『搶劫或搶奪吧？！我再問一下律師會好一些！』我故意說嚴重些。

我看見他們已經在計算如果我這樣一告的話，他們會很麻煩…

頓時決定來個火上加油的手腕，把胸前的錄音機（當時只有小型錄音機）拿出來，對他
們說：『從我進這個門，我們所有對話我都錄下音，需要時可提供法官參考！』

我知道這個動作是很具有挑戰性的，通常的人一旦面對麥克風或者錄音、錄影時，都會
收斂許多…

我看他們立即壓低聲音討論起來，然後對我很防備…

趁著對方陷入抉擇與討論之際，我看著小外甥說：『你覺得你自己有錯嗎？！』
他點點頭。

『你覺得你應該怎麼辦呢？！』我問他。

『道歉……！！！』他小聲的說。

『但是不是做錯事情，靠著道歉都可以解決啊！你知道嗎？！』我補充。

大姊在一旁著急，但是我請她把事情交給我，不要再表示任何意見…

『你們討論結果如何呢？！我們可以一起去警察局了嗎？！』

我再次邀約對方家長。

『有其他方式解決嗎？！』這時對方爸爸口氣委婉許多。

『你說呢？！我想聽聽你的意見！！！』我回答。

『你們的小孩向我們道歉！這件事就算了！』

他似乎認為這是解決的方式，而且說得有些勉強…。

在一旁的老師似乎認為這很合理，還猛然點頭…

結果，我直接拒絕，說：『不！！！』

這個拒絕一出現，大家又都愣住了…

『為什麼？！』對方家長認為我很無禮拒絕他們的善意。

我清了清喉嚨，說：『該道歉的不應該只有我們家的小孩！』

『起因是誰呢？！你認為你們的小孩沒有錯嗎？！』

『請不要告訴我：被打和流血的人已經夠可憐了，所以可以免責！』

『那麼你認為該如何？！』對方家長問。

我知道他是壓抑著火氣，也知道他有些小來頭…

『你們的小孩也必須道歉！』我認真的說。

我看見他鐵綠著臉的表情實在很好玩，於是補充一句：『還要正式寫和解書，請老師當
第三公證人！』

此話一出，相信大家都會認為我不通情理，其實這是為了避免未來產生麻煩。

事情的結局就是如我的要求：
一、這2個小孩彼此道歉，互相寫一份道歉卡給對方。
二、雙方家長簽立和解書，老師當公證人。
三、此間醫療費用憑收據由我方支付。（其實也不需要看醫生，所以免付）
*****************************************
後來回到 大姐 家時，我問她：『為什麼妳要道歉…？！』
她說：『對方家長很兇，對方小孩也流鼻血…！』
後來我們聊很多，我略作整理如下：（僅供大家參考）

一、『闖禍』有時是一種無價的學習！
1.不要讓小孩子因此退縮了！

2.即使在外頭打架，先問清楚原因！（不要急著揍小孩，這也是一種教育！）

3.有時候我還會告訴自己的小孩：『打得好！』『我也一樣會忍不住去K他！』

4..但是事後等小孩心平氣和之後再引導：如果重來一次，有其他方式嗎？！

5.不論如何，當家長的心情必須很平緩！

二、即使小孩真的犯錯了，家長不必急著去道歉：

1.又不是家長犯錯，所以請家長不必『強出頭』吧！

2.要道歉的是小孩子，所以小孩必須在過程中了解『錯在哪』！

3.如果家長一直搶著道歉，就等於幫小孩子到處在「擦屁股」！會養成小孩倚賴！

4.『不積極作為』其實就是一種『作為』，但是家長必須耐住火候！

5.引導小孩子從單一事件，了解到「如果再有近似的情況，該怎麼辦！？」

6.讓小孩子自己知進退，這才是教育！（壓抑不是唯一或者最棒的管教方式）

三、家長必須多為自己打氣與加油：

1.全家人的『健康』必須排在第一位！

2.『成績』必須排在『品格』的後面！（太多家長排錯了！）

3.多找機會和小朋友聊天！（543的亂哈啦也很好！）

4.不要讓自己當『一輩子』的家長！當小孩25歲之後，該當朋友比較好！

5.不要把小孩子的問題『放大』！但要將他們的好『放大』！

6.常常給自己加油一番！

7.『家』是最好的一個一個倚靠！向著家人要能夠敞開！

8.好朋友之間也常常一起互相鼓舞

FW: Egg Attack

請注意！?
如果晚上你在駕駛時受到雞蛋攻擊千萬不要起動噴水功能和開動水掃~?
因為雞蛋參水後將呈現白色阻擋視線高達92.5巴仙~?
你將被迫停在路邊而成為劫匪的囊中物~?
這是馬來西亞柔佛巴魯匪徒所採用的最新技倆~?
防不勝防~?請轉告你身邊的親朋戚友~?
請小心謹慎看待此事~

Fw: TVB Hong Kong's Documentary on Penang - CM Lim Guan Eng................MUST SEE!!!!

This clip is very inspiring to many, not just in
> Malaysia
> > but also in
> > other countries.
> >
> > Hong Kong TV program about Penang – Penang people
> esp.
> > should watch this!
> >
> > Also, please distribute this to your friends &
> other
> > family to watch.
> >
> >
> > Part 1, 2, 3 >> with English subtitles
> > =========
> >
> >
> >

沒事衣物不要送乾洗

我跟我先生之前在洗衣工廠工作，他會接觸到乾洗劑，結果做快一年身體變得很虛弱 (變成奧少年)，檢查的結果是肝臟有問題離職後調養了好幾年，才慢慢好起來。

他的結論是：沒事衣物不要送乾洗，用水手洗最乾淨 ....

請用力告訴你的朋友吧！！

清潔劑不是在洗的時候才會傷害...................

法國 2歲男童夢中窒息喪命　床單窗簾乾洗溶劑惹禍！

衣物送乾洗，竟然害小孩因此送了命？

在法國一位 2 歲男童，因為家長將床單、窗簾等等全部送乾洗，上頭還殘留有毒的乾洗有機溶劑，導致小男童在睡夢中窒息送命，是全球罕見的致死案例！

因此醫師特別提醒，乾洗衣物一定要擺到沒有味道後再穿、再收藏比較安全。

衣服送乾洗後，上頭一定會有股化學味道，相信很多民眾都很熟悉，只是沒想到洗得乾乾淨淨的衣物，上面殘留的氣味卻成了殺人兇手，在法國就奪走一位 2歲男童的性命。

元兇就是致命的乾洗劑、四氯乙烯，而這種乾洗劑在國內還有 1百多家店正在使用。

林口長庚毒物科主任林杰樑指出，四氯乙烯恐怕會造成肝腎傷害，有致癌的疑慮，且濃度高的話還可能麻痺呼吸，致人於死！至於大部分乾洗店用的石油矽，也還是具有肝毒性。

怎麼知道自己是不是置身於致命環境中，林杰樑表示，其實只要聞得到化學氣味，就代表濃度已經超過100PPM，絕對不能逗留超過 15 分鐘。

至於拿回家的乾洗衣物，一定要先拿掉防塵塑膠套，擺到沒有氣味後再收藏、再穿，才不會對身體有害。

如果您收到別人分享給您的好文章，不要吝嗇，您也可以繼續分享給好友，請別忘我這一份喔。

當我們用心對人時，有心人將會適時回饋給你。

不用錢-打全世界30餘國室內電話軟體

好用與否不妨一試

1.軟體名稱：VoipStunt
2.軟體語系：英文
3.軟體簡介：可打全世界30餘國的室內電話完全不用錢,打 手機就要收費,播打方法跟 skype 相同的網路電話
4.軟體(檔案)版本(日期)：2.08
5.軟體性質共享、免費、破解：free
6.軟體類型：網路工作
7.下載方式(工具)：由官網直接下載
8.運行環境： Win9x/WinNT/ 2000/ME/XP
9.相關聯結 http://www.voipstun t.com/en/ splashvoipin. html


打全世界30餘國的室內電話(regular laneline) 完全不用錢的軟體！
打室內電話(regular laneline) 全部不用錢
手機就要收費了
播打方法跟 skype 相同
試過打美國跟台灣，很清楚喔

ps:好像有時間限制...3分鐘的樣子就會切斷了

Ex: 台北 +886 2 xxxxxxxx 2是區域碼
Ex: US San Jose +140 8 xxxxxxx

Fw: Have you seen this bird?

A seagull in Scotland has developed the habit of stealing chips from a neighbourhood shop.
The seagull waits until the shopkeeper isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos.

Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds.

The seagulls shoplifting started early this month when he first swooped into the store in Aberdeen , Scotland , and helped himself to a bag of chips. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of chips.

Customers have begun paying for the seagulls stolen bags of chips because they think it's so funny.

Fw: BEWARE OF DANGER IN MALAYSIA : NEWSPAPERS LYING ONTHE ROAD

Date: Tuesday, June 23, 2009, 8:40 AM

Don’t know if its true……………..

Beware of newspapers lying on the road
If you are driving in Malaysia , do take note of the advice below..
Please pass this onto yr friends.. Avoid driving over newspapers
strewn on the road It would appear that this technique has reached
Malaysia from Indonesia .

Life here is getting more like in Indonesia these days. This story
which was circulated to me reminds me of the traps set in certain
parts of Jakarta by robbers.. Some people have lost their lives over
this. They drive into certain lonely roads in Jakarta to find pieces
of wood with nails in them on the road. This causes their tyres to go
flat. If they get out of their cars, they are set upon by robbers who
will take everything: their cars, wallets, anything valuable and
sometimes their lives.
Avoid driving over newspapers strewn on the Road a new trap set by
Robbers. This incident happened some where in KL and forwarded to me
by a friend..
This person was driving alone at night when he saw newspapers lying
around in the middle of the road. Without giving it much thought, he
drove pass the stack of papers. No one would expect to find heaps of
rocks and stones beneath the papers!! Wanting to know the damage to
his car, he stopped to check.
Need I say more? The moment he got out of his car, he was robbed by a
group of guys and lost his properties/belongings. Just imagine what
would have happen if this had happen to a girl/woman....
So folks, please be careful, do not stop when you're driving alone at
night no matter what ! Avoid driving over the papers if you see
newspapers lying on the road, this could be a new trick for the
desperate fraternity out there...........!!

Subject: FW: Mailcios code Security Alert - 07/09

For the past few days the death of the “King of Pop”, Michael Jackson was the hottest news. No doubts lot of people eager to find out more information on this breaking news. Unfortunately, there is a small minority in society is taking this opportunity send out spam messages offering links to unpublished videos and pictures of Michael Jackson. However, when you click on the link you are taken to a website which secretly installs malicious code onto your PCs.

We strongly advice you DELETE this kind of mail immediately if you do received.

Below is the sample of the spam mail.